Future Koko and Aying,

Kamusta? Okay ka na ba? Naka-move on ka na ba o nagkabalikan na kayong dalawa? I know the you now is most definitely a changed person but you cannot deny what your heart really feels. Alam mo sa sarili mo na siya na diba? 2 years together, 6 years LDR, multiple fights, overseas trip, laughters, crazy jokes, a lot of tricycle rides, making out (hahahaha), real talk sa isa't-isa kahit masakit, hugging each other kahit na-order lang ng pagkain sa McDo o Jollibee, kissing parts of your face when we're about to sleep, supporting one another. It has been tough these days (btw, typing this on the 6th of March 2020, 6:56 am CET).
Aying, at this very moment, di mo alam paano ka makaka-focus kase siya lang yung iniisip mo. Kapag gigising, agad agad, bida sa isipan mo yang si Koko. You're thinking of writing him a letter and then posting it. Kaso iniisip mo din ung sinabe mo na bibigyan mo siya ng oras at di mo siya guguluhin. Ang hirap diba? Kaya eto, dito ko nalang isusulat. Sa future na kayo, I hope you two are both okay. May problema din si Koko kaya he asked for space. He's not in his prime and so are you. Know that the time apart is time for you to heal and hopefully, miss each other a lot more and realise that both of you complete one another. He loves you like crazy, Ying. It's just that he needs time to be his best self again, and so do you. Hindi ka okay, at this very moment in the past, at sana kung binabasa mo ito ngayon, he's there next to you. Or if not, screenshot mo tapos pabasa mo sa kanya. You are each other's soulmate. And as stupid as it might sound, gasgas na, nasabe mo na sa lahat ng kakilala mo at sa kanya, soulmates find their way back to each other. That's why I know deep in my heart, my bai, kahit sinong i-date ko, I know I won't be giving the same love I gave you and still giving you. And as selfish as this may sound, sana ganun ka din.
To be honest, there are no tears now. It's been 5 months nung naghiwalay tayo and I think I have exhausted my eyes. Wala nang iyak. Or maybe tanggap ko na yung nangyare pero hindi pa ko over it totally. And will I ever get over it kaya? Whatever you are doing right now na natanggap mo itong e-mail from the old you, I hope you feel alive, Ying. I hope you can smile, kahit na masakit pa din to this day. I hope you will laugh, kung magkasama niyo itong binabasa. I hope you both realise that you are each other's strength. Without being there for one another, it's just empty and painful and dark. I hope the future Ying and Koko are okay. That both of you are thriving. Sana mag-plano kayo ng future niyo. Wag kayo puro saya hahahaha!! Take each other seriously and be very communicative. It will not always be happy days. You both know that, but the old Aying is hoping that you both can brave through anything now. You're on each other's team. Bakit ba sinusulat ko to na parang sure ako na magkakabalikan kayong dalawa at kayo na ulit at this very moment?? I may be thinking out loud, I may not. Malay mo you both eat your pride and find your way back to each other. Love is beautiful, indeed.
To my bai, if you're reading this, contact me!! Call me!! We need to laugh about this! We need to look back, celebrate and reminisce this romantic Aying. At kung nandiyan ako, kasama ka while reading this long-ass e-mail from the past, let's go on a date? :)
Alam mo naman na hirap ako magsabe date ng nararamdaman ko, but you taught me how to open up and not be shy about how I feel. And I am so happy you did. It's wonderful how much you made me realise that my feelings are worth listening to. Your sensitive baby needs a hug. Mag-iyakan kayo diyan, it's fine. Be vulnerable with each other. You got each other's back. Sana at this moment, okay ka na, Ko. Sana wag mo na sarilihin lahat, nandiyan si Aying para sa'yo. Although she's mean and a bitch, she cares for you A LOT. Minsan nga she thinks of you more than she thinks of the food she wants to eat. The old Aying and the current Aying, alam mo naman, everybody knows, she loves you like crazy, too. Kaso crazy lang din siya minsan when she's hurt. She will break up with you instantly kapag grabe yung naramdaman niya, I hope you understand. Pero praise mo naman siya because she tries her best. And you do, too. The old you are both still immature and that's okay. You guys can grow together, learn from one another. Aying right now is saying this as if kayo na ulit this December. Sana. If not, ano pang hinihintay mo? Bakit di mo pa siya i-message? Stop torturing each other. You love her, alam mo yan. So go, chase her. She loves you, too. Intensely. I'm sure, she's waiting for you to come home to her. Wag ka na mahiya. Or you'll regret it for the rest of your life. And to the future Aying, reach out din. Love is a two-way direction. Hindi porke't si Koko yung lalake, siya na lahat. It's almost 2021, make your move or you'll lose the man you want to spend the rest of your life with.

I am rooting for the both of you so don't hold it in. Show the love!!

From March 2020 Aying