..
..as all starts, we were strangers.
..

hey, it's me. 3nood, the junior you seem to spend your time teaching and listening to. your deer lmao. i'm writing this on the 11th of june of 2017, and right now we're taking a pause from you teaching me chem bc you're trying to tell a man from a studio to send you pics for the newspaper. a55 i'm really proud and happy for ya, you might be the third bs you're always first place to me.

anyway, it's kinda risky writing and sending this. who knows what could happen these 6-7 months. i really really hope i don't regret trusting you. you know me better than most- hell you probably know me better than anyone i know. which is terrifying. you don’t know how easily you can crush me, i’ve practically put myself in the palms of your hands. so please be gentle with me, i’m tired of getting hurt.

..
..so then the strangers became friends.
..

sigh, for someone who talks about her love to the world and all its inhabitants, i don't talk about my love for you.
i know, love, such a strong word. i can practically hear you calling me a liar, someone who loves an act, a facade, and how this just shows that it doesn't exist.

bs yo hold up- i didn't say i'm in love with ya so don't get any questionable thoughts lmao.

i really do care and appreciate you v much. i wasn't planning on letting anyone in, but somehow you've breached all my defenses and borrowed yourself under my skin. can't you see? i won't forget ya. i can’t. there’ll be a lil corner in my heart and brain dedicated to the person who listened to me talk about myself on on and on, who let me be me. who appreciated both me as an optimist and as an addict to death. so thank you for that- i didn’t realise how much i needed a listener and an acceptor until i met you. you don’t know how much that means to me.

and.. you’re so much more than a listener. i’m not going to lie, i’m selfish. i replied to you those first few days meeting you because i was lonely. but then that changed. you’re not just a listener. you’re a friend, a really close one, and psst i kinda have a crush on you rn bs god knows feelings and people change so who knows what’s happened by the time january rolls around.

you’re amazingly kind, and you just prove it more when you deny it. you’re an amazing listener. a fun person to be around. i adore our little jokey arguments, and our AM conversations laced with the coalescence of sleep and dreams. i adore it when you take the time out of your day to teach me. i just adore thank you. for filling my days with the color of yellow, with you. you say you’re using me but god knows it’s def me using you.

even if you grow to hate or forget about me, i still gave you a piece of me unknowingly, and because of that, i'll never forget you. but i really hope you’ll forget about me. seriously boi you need to learn to pick better friends. you deserve better than a human fluctuation, a confusion, an anomaly. You deserve someone as good as you to be ur friend. someone as smart as you. as kind as you. as eloquent as you.

i guess the branches of life and fate intersected us at this point, so perhaps we’ll grow apart, only to come together again. or perhaps we’re both just life lessons for each other, and then we’ll grow apart, making this shared existence a secret until the very end.

the point of this all? is to thank you. if you were a life lesson, then you were the kindest of all, and it was a pleasure knowing you for this short time. whoever has the blessing of being intersected with you till the very end is a lucky person. thank you for everything. i hope i made your days as bright as you made mine. forget me now.



..
..and then we were strangers again.
..


or maybe not. hey, drop me an email yeah?